Since the children were very little, it’s always been our fall ritual to go apple picking with our friends the Feinbergs. He and my husband were groomsmen for one another in our weddings, and we've known each other's kids since birth. The outing is now a part of our traditions together, another piece of fabric sewn into the quilt of our friendship. We load up the minivans and head to Wisconsin for some hay rides and tree climbing in the orchards. With each passing year, the kids become more independent, better able to navigate their way amidst the trees and pick the best apples offered. They used to require a boost to reach the upper branches. Now we watch them scurry up on their own. Tasting the fresh fruit and feeling the juices run down our chins, signals the arrival of this most beautiful season, just as much as watching the leaves change and seeing the pumpkins arrive on doorsteps. This year, when I call my friend to find a date, we both quickly become dismayed as we tick … [Read more...]
What I’ll Miss About This Summer…
For the first time in years, maybe ever, I found myself this summer with time to spare. Perhaps "to spare" is too generous. Rather, I found myself with time I could carve out in ways that I desired, instead of ways that were dictated to me by my work, my children, my parents, depending on the stage of life. This rare and exciting gift didn’t happen by accident. I crafted the situation. After Mr. C headed off to overnight camp, which you can read all about here and here, I decided to sign up my littlest guy, Mr.B, for five days a week of full time summer camp. He already had been going three days a week the first part of the summer, and Mr. B had done well at camp thus far. So I decided a little more consistency would do me him good. Second session began, and off he went, getting onto the bus every morning with his older sisters around 8:40 a.m., and then returning home with them on the bus every afternoon a little after 4 p.m. That gave this mama more than seven hours all to … [Read more...]
From Fourteen to Forty…
The little town with the lake house sits sandwiched between the suburbs where we all live and a resort town in the state next door. We are invited up for the day with our kids. No husbands, please. Our hostess tells me it's a celebration of sorts to mark the culmination of that period between school ending and camp beginning. I call this period "purgatory," as I’m not sure whether to relish or lament the lack of schedule. It depends on the day, the hour, the minute. But this day we’ve had on the calendar for a while, and I’ve been looking forward to spending time with some of my oldest and dearest friends. My guess is in high school, some people saw us as a clique. We ate lunch together. We congregated together in that intimidating, insecure way teenagers congregate. We always ended up together on the weekends, even if we started the night separately. We took photographs together with our dates before school dances. For graduation, we organized a big dinner with our families; then … [Read more...]
For My Friend on What Should Be Her 40th Birthday
Ten years ago today, my due date with my first child coincides with Mera's 30th birthday. When I call Mera to send my best wishes and good cheer, I tell her I’m not sure if I can make it to the special steak dinner at Angelo and Maxie’s later that night. She understands because that is just like her to understand a circumstance she herself has yet to experience. Mera’s that good of a friend. I spend the day reclining on my couch, my legs splayed out in front of me, my burgeoning belly contracting and then stopping. Only 5% of women actually deliver on their due date, yet for some reason I figure I will be among them. As the hours tick by, I go from bored to mildly depressed that nothing is happening. To distract myself, I think about Mera’s birthday dinner and debate whether to go. Yes, I’m very pregnant and uncomfortable, but it is her 30th birthday, a milestone for sure, and one that carries even more weight because of her secret. It’s a secret that only a few of us know: Mera … [Read more...]
